Well, I'm not sure if more than one or two people read these infrequent and shlumpy posts, but that's ok. I guess I'm just writing this for my own benefit mostly. :0) On November 1st I found out that I am expecting my first child. You could have knocked me over with a feather. I am very happy. This is something I've wanted for a good ten years. Recently, I had just come to grips with the fact that it may never happen. That was a tough process.
My eating has not been good at all though. I'm surprised at myself actually. I always assumed that if I ever became pregnant, motherly instinct would instantly take over, and I would eat only perfectly healthy food. Granted, I've been through some major stress lately, including spotting and loss of some symptoms that led my doctor to schedule an immediate ultrasound (baby is fine). Still, I would have thought/hoped that scare would reinforce my determination to eat well. Was I being naieve?
It's weird...usually I am either very queasy or craving foods. Even when I was doing not too well (prior to the pregnancy) I still ate a ton of vegetables on a daily basis...at least a good pound/day. This has just become part of my routine over the past 1 1/2 years. Now, the thought of peas (my favorite) makes my stomach turn...along with my other favorite veggies. Even my beloved oatmeal sounds gross.
Instead, I want sweet and mild things like fruit and vanilla yogurt, which is fine, but also lots of crap I should stay away from. I think I'm facing a food addiction/pregnancy double whammy. I am determined to have a healthy pregnancy though. I need to dig deep and do what's best for the baby and myself. I'm only 9 weeks and 2 days along. I can either stay healthy throughout the next seven months and hopefully have a smooth and uneventful birth, or I can balloon up and put myself and my child at risk. Put in those terms how could I possibly stuff another piece of pizza or whatever into my mouth?
Basically, I want to strike a healthy balance...healthy eating without being too strict on myself at a time when I need to chill out and be calm. How do women stay calm during pregnancy?! I wish I had some family to count on...I guess I'm feeling that pretty hard right now. I'm also very slow to make friends. Right now I'm looking for a pregnancy support group to join. So far no luck, but there must be one out there in my area (I definitely need the face to face contact).
Other than that, I think I might go back to OA. I'm not looking to lose weight, but I certainly need to learn how to eat regular healthy portions and just be satisfied. I am determined to model healthy eating behaviors for my child when the time comes. I firmly believe there is no reason that he or she should ever have to deal with food issues the way I do.
My doctor wants me to eat 1,800 calories a day. She is a firm believer in this. I figure that as long as I stick to 2,000 I will be just fine. That's my plan, along with an hour of moderately paced walking every morning...maybe some hand weights if I get over the fact that they bore the crap out of me. Pretty simple. Also, I take a prenatal vitamin and a fish oil capsule for fatty amino acids every morning. My water intake is somewhere around 64-96 oz. I'll have to slowly work the veggies back in...it's tough.
That's about it for now. A lot lies ahead of me.